


Because Of You

by chrissy2



Category: Shoey, Youtube Celebrities
Genre: Anxiety, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Character Death, Depression, Drama, F/M, Life Changes, M/M, Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-11
Updated: 2014-11-19
Packaged: 2018-02-25 00:31:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 16
Words: 10,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2601998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chrissy2/pseuds/chrissy2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The year is 2022. [Shane, 34. Joey, 31. Lisa, 40.] Shane has retired from youtube and becomes depressed. Lisa and him had a peaceful breakup and he now lives alone. Lisa, knowing of his depression, asks Joey to go visit him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Reunions.

Joey checked his facebook messages and smiled when he found Lisa among them: 'Hey joey :D'

"Lisa-Lisbug~!" he found himself saying out loud. Living alone a lot of the time made you develop a habit of talking to yourself.

JOEY: 'Hey girl!! :D'

LISA: 'Hey everyone, iiiiiit's Loey!! :D'

He busted out laughing, reading the last message in her lively voice.

JOEY: ':D!! So hru? :p'

LISA: 'Oh im doing great :) traveling a lot and making kids laugh'

JOEY: 'Oooooh fun! Does Shane travel with you?'

LISA: 'No we broke up'

JOEY: '????!!! When did this happen?!'

LISA: 'Last year'

JOEY: 'OMG im sorry girl what happened?'

LISA: 'Oh nothing! :) we realized we were just friends. we still see each other every now and then.'

It took a while for him to respond.

JOEY: 'Sorry for the late response. facebook is being a stupid skank ass hoe LOL. Text me!!'

He sent her his number and they continued with their conversation.

LISA: 'Hey :D'

JOEY: 'Iiiiiit's Loey again!! :D so how is Shane?'

LISA: 'LOL actually that's what I wanted to talk to you about if u don't mind.'

JOEY: 'Shoot girl not at all!! is there something wrong?'

LISA: 'I think hes despressed :( he retired from youtube'

Joey then realized how long it had been since he got together with them. A lot really had changed, and he wasn't too comfortable with that. He didn't like change too much.

JOEY: 'So what does he do now? does he stay home all day?'

LISA: 'Idk :( would you do me a favor?'

Joey prepared himself for the answer.

Joey had to wait another month to see Shane on his vacation. He was always so busy with collaborations, charity works, competitions and making films. He tried messaging Shane to tell him that he planned on visiting but he just could not reach him. Not through email or text. Lisa never mentioned him changing his phone number. He tried texting Lisa but she did not answer. She must've had her hands full.

Before he knew it, quicker than his stomach could take, the plane landed, the taxi drove him to Shane's house and he was standing at his driveway. Hopefully the address wasn't wrong. He wouldn't mind him visiting, right? He never did before. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door. 

He found himself waiting for quite some time, and began to wonder if Shane was even home. Was he out somewhere? Was he showering? Was this even the right house? He knocked again, a little louder this time. Little did he know, a shocked Shane was looking at him through a window.

What was HE doing here? Why does he have a suitcase? He debated whether he should let him in or not. The place had been kind of trashed since Lisa left. Finally, when Joey picked up his suitcase and started walking away, trying to remember all the hotels in the area, Shane rushed to the door.

"Hey!" he greeted, trying to put on his best smile.

"Hey!" Joey greeted back, and came in for a hug. He kinda smelled like sweat. "How are you~? Sorry for barging in like this. I tried messaging you, but you didn't answer. Did you change your number?"

Shane hugged him back, then pulled away. "I did. It's okay, though."

He wasn't as talkative as he usually was. His eyes were a bit sunken in and he was starting to grow a beard. What had he been doing with himself?

"Mind if I come in?"

Shane really didn't want any guests right now. He wasn't really in the mood for anything anymore. "Uh, well, yeah. It's kind of messy. And I know how you are about messes."

"Oh, please! I can be messy too. You've seen my room!"

Joey picked his suitcase up and made his way through the door.


	2. Conflict.

Shane rolled his eyes as Joey barged in and he closed the door behind. Fucking narcissist. Thinks he can do whatever he wants.

"Ooooh~, it IS a bit messy," Joey admitted. "Just needs a little tidying and it will be good as new."

Shane let out a nervous laugh, resisting the urge to say, 'It's my house. It can be messy if I want it to be.' But he wasn't too proud of the mess himself.

Joey sat down on the couch and Shane joined him. "So how have you been?"

"Lisa put you up to this, didn't she?" Shane smirked.

Joey let out a shy scoff. He couldn't lie. "She did, actually."

"Figures. She worries."

"She thinks you're depressed."

Both men were quiet for a while, then Shane finally said, "It took Lisa to persuade you to come here."

"Hm?"

"You never liked me at all, did you?"

Joey's eyebrows knotted together. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means what it means," Shane snapped.

"Of course, I like you! I wouldn't be here if I didn't."

"And the passed few years you haven't visited or messaged me at all?"

"I was busy! YOU were busy! I'm sorry. I didn't know it hurt you that much. You acted sensitive. I didn't know you really were that sensitive." He probably shouldn't have been smiling when he said that, but it was cute.

Shane stood up. "Get out."

"What?" Joey said, shocked. It wasn't cute anymore. He stood up to be level with him. "You want me to be honest? I have always admired you. YOU were my inspiration."

"All you wanted was to use me to climb the youtube ladder."

"Part of it WAS to get more hits. All youtubers are guilty of that, even you--"

"--I WORKED my way to the top! By myself--!"

"--But I also worked with you because I wanted to be your friend. You were a brilliant artist. Smart, funny--all the things I wanted to be. I wouldn't have worked with you if I didn't like you." Shane stayed quiet and Joey continued. "It only seemed like I didn't like you because we were so different. You were so open! You could video yourself talking about the most embarrassing stories without any shame. I was shy and conventional and prude. Heck, I didn't even want KISSING on my channel. Thought it was too much."

Shane looked away. "Please go."

He couldn't leave him. Joey approached him and wrapped his arms around him. "No."

Shane tried pushing him off, but he couldn't. "What are you doing?"

"Showing you that I care."

"Get off me!"

"No!"

Shane tried fighting some more, but gave up and hugged him back, burying his face in his shoulder. They held each other for a while, rubbing each other's backs. Then finally, Shane whispered, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Joey assured.

"No, it's not. That was uncalled for."

Joey pulled away, Shane's face red from crying. "It's fine, really. You want me to leave? I can just find a hotel somewhere."

Shane wiped his eyes and sniffed. "Why ARE you here?"

"To see you."

"How long are you staying?" he then asked, turning to his suitcase.

"A week. Really, I can find a hotel if it's too much."

"No, no. Stay."

Joey was shocked by his reluctance. "You sure?"

"Yes. I don't have much company anymore."

 

DAY TWO.  
Joey turned his camera on and pressed the recording button. God, it had been months since his last video. Or had it been years? He used to have to make multiple videos every week. It was tiring then but he kind of missed it. He held the camera up and viewed his reflection in the bathroom mirror.

"Hello, everyone~" he whispered, waving. "God, it has been AGES since I last made a video. Seriously like, twelve and a half million years. I'm whispering right now because I don't want Shane to hear me!" He brought his finger up to his lips. "Ssssssssh. That's right! Hash tag Shoey! We're baaaaack. I don't care if it's old--true love never dies! Anyways, I came over yesterday and in all honesty, I saw he hasn't been doin' too well. When he opened the door, I was mortified: beard! Full on BEARD! Oh no, you didn't! I could handle the short haircut, but this is just WRONG! Only I can pull off that much facial hair!"

He REALLY needed to stop rambling.

"Anyways, I wanted to tackle him and shave it off! Oh, geez, I'm not sure how I can do that and hold the camera at the same time...I may have to set you guys down somewhere."

He took the camera, shaving cream and razor to the living room with him. It was empty for now. He placed the camera at a corner of the room, beside a window. He waited for Shane to come around and tackled him to the floor. "Shaving time!"

At first, Shane was irritated but then started joking the more they wrestled. "Daddy, no! Not shaving time!"

After a while, Joey could hardly see because he was laughing so hard. He was always laughing hysterically around this guy.

"The last shaving time was not on my face! I don't like this game, daddy!"

Man, this guy was terrible. Funny, but terrible. 

The beard was eventually shaved off and then Joey had to trim and straighten his hair. When the makeover was done, he almost looked liked the old Shane. Not the fat one! The one with the lesbian hair cut. There was only a bit of aging in his face. Even so, he aged very well.


	3. Nightmare.

DAY THREE.  
"Where's Corny?" Joey asked, then immediately regret asking when Shane looked at him sadly. "Did she...?"

"He nodded. "Yeah."

"When?"

"Last year."

"Oh...I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Shane assure, and tried smiling. "Grandma has a little playmate now."

Joey tried to smile along with him. He knew how much he believed in his grandmother's spiritual presence. "That's right. She's giving her little kisses!"

"Beat you to them, grandma," he then said, looking upward. "That dog's cherry is MINE!"

They had a good laugh. Then when the laughter died, Shane's smile slowly went back down. "He died shortly after her."

"He?"

"My dad."

Joey's eyes widened. "HIM?"

"Yeah. Drinking finally killed him."

"Oh my goodness..."

"Yeah."

Joey watched his eyes fill with tears. He sniffed and looked upwards, as if trying to sense his father too. "I just..." He took a deep sigh. "I just--" A tear fell and he quickly wiped it away. "I know he beat me and yelled at me and told me I was fucking worthless, but..."

He put his face in his hands, and Joey moved to Shane's side of the couch to put an arm around him.

"Maybe I could've met up with him or...maybe we could've worked it all out...maybe we could finally put the past behind us, you know."

Joey understood completely. He had a bad relationship with his father, but they got along later in life. 

He was lucky. "Right."

The tears kept falling and Shane failed to stop them. "God, I'm sorry. This is so stupid."

"This is not stupid at all," Joey assured. "When I went to therapy, I learned that talking about it and crying was more affective than medication." He brought a hand up through Shane's hair and pulled him inward, against his shoulder. "Don't keep it in."

 

DAY FOUR.  
Joey woke up early in the morning with a bad feeling in his stomach. Something told him to go check on Shane. This feeling quickly turned into panic. He threw the blanket off, leapt from the couch and ran to Shane's bedroom. The bed was empty.

"Shane?"

Whatever told him to check on Shane then told him to look in the bathroom. He ran to the bathroom, and nearly fell to his knees. Shane's limp body was hunched over the side of the tub, his head dunked into the water.

He immediately picked him up. "Shane!" He slapped him, pressed on his chest and blew through his mouth, trying everything that he could. "SHANE!"

Joey was so frightened that he woke himself up from the nightmare, finding him back on the couch. Fearing the dream's meaning, he jumped up and started running towards Shane's room only to meet him in the hallway.

"Hey," he said, concern in his voice. "Whoo, you scared me. Are you okay? Was that you screaming?"

Joey was so shaken up. It took him a moment to answer. "Y-yeah. That was me. Sorry about that."

"It's alright," Shane assured. "Did you have a bad dream?"

"Yeah..."

"Why were you running?"

"I wanted to check on you." He didn't even think. The words just slipped out.

Shane looked confused. "Check on ME?"

"Yeah."

"Was it something that happened in your dream?"

"Yeah..."

That seemed to be all he could say.

"What happened?"

Joey rubbed his eyes. "Something just awful..."

Shane brought his hands up to his shoulders. "Hey. Hey, it's okay," he whispered. "It was just a dream. It's not real. Come on, you can lay with me if you want. I used to have trouble sleeping at night, so I totally get it." He attempted to soothe the scared man with a sleepy smile. "Daddy issues, you know. I'm alright. I'm not hurt."

Joey could hardly speak. He just nodded.

Shane then brought his arm around his waist and led him to his room. "Come on..."


	4. Depression.

Shane was the first to wake up the next morning, Joey's arm over him. He smiled. How sweet and brotherly. He tried moving away without waking him up, but failed. Joey's eyes snapped open, wide and red. "Shane!" he gasped.

Him gasping made Shane gasp. "What, what's wrong?" he asked, holding his hand gently.

Joey's red eyes then wandered around the room, as if trying to remember what happened. "I just...I just got scared. That's all. I-I'm fine now."

"Dude, I gotta be honest--you're really freaking me out." He squeezed his hand. "What kind of nightmare did you HAVE?"

The scared man let his face fall into a pillow. "It was awful. It was one of the worst dreams I ever had."

Shane kneeled down beside the bed, still holding Joey's hand. "Tell me about it. Please. Talking about it will help. It's about me anyway."

"It is..." he finally said. It took a moment for him to let it push passed his lips. "I dreamt that you died."

As he predicted, Shane smirked and snickered. "I died?"

Joey nodded. "Mmhm."

"Is that all?"

"Shane...you killed yourself." Shane did not joke this time. He frowned and his eyes drooped with dread. "You drowned yourself in the tub."

When Shane continued to stare, he came to a realization. "Oh my god."

"What?"

"You actually thought of doing it."

"Well, yeah. Everyone does at least once in their lives."

"But so much? You're clearly depressed."

Shane let go of his hand and stood up. "Well, what do you expect? Look at me. Even if I wasn't, it is none of your business."

Joey nearly trembled with rage. "It IS my business! You're my friend and I care about you!"

"Right."

"You still don't trust me?" Shane stayed quiet. "I nearly had a panic attack over that nightmare. I really thought you were gone and it tore me up. I haven't felt something like that in YEARS."

"I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Shane--"

"Just DROP IT."

"I can't. How do you expect me to just drop that?"

"Please just...stop. I don't want to talk about this. We are both overreacting."

Joey nodded. Both of them were not handling this very well. "Okay. I'm sorry. I just care about you and it would be terrible to lose you. I just want you to know that."

Shane nodded. "Thank you." All was quiet for a moment, then Shane said, "I'm a little hungry. Do you want something."

"Sure."

"Cool. I'll go see what I have."

Shane left the room and Joey just laid there for a few minutes, listening to him open cabinets and drawers. The sheets smelled like him. After a while, he got out of bed and joined him in the kitchen. Shane heard him approach. "Hey, I have eggs and bacon and--"

Before he could say another word, Joey walked up from behind and Shane could feel his breath against his ear. Then he gently placed his hand beneath his chin to turn him around for a kiss.


	5. Timelessness.

Shane turned around to place his hands around Joey's head and pulled him in to deepen the kiss. This was a real kiss with real feeling. They were not acting in front of a camera to impress their fan base. It was genuine. Shane could feel his body go numb, his mind washed of their last argument. When they broke apart, they just found themselves holding each other and looking into each other's eyes. Just like those corny ass fanfictions written by ten-year-olds.

What the fuck?

This was so stupid.

Didn't things like this only happen in stories?

Shane smirked out of shyness. "I'm not hungry, all of a sudden."

"I was never really hungry, actually," Joey snickered, and they both just bashfully giggled like a couple of girls.

"I think I wanna go back to bed. Not to do that, you know, just--"

"I know what you mean," Joey nodded. "Same. Have a lazy day."

And so Shane led them out of the kitchen and back to his bed, where they just held each other and kissed tenderly. Both men just couldn't wrap their heads around the whole thing. They went from a fake but shameless relationship to a sweet, romantic friendship. When they weren't kissing, they just gently rubbed each other's sides and backs, and ran their fingers through each others' hair.

Didn't Shane hate Joey's guts like two days ago?

"This doesn't change who you are," Shane whispered at random.

"What do you mean? Joey asked."

"I know you don't like guys. And this doesn't change that. You and I are just really close and very comfortable around each other."

"Right."

Shane smirked again after a thought. "I can just see all the comments on youtube, facebook and twitter if this ever got out."

"Oh goodness gracionias, the comments."

"Have you read all of the conspiracy theories about Shoey?"

"There are theories about us?"

"There are too many."

"I don't think I want to know."

Shane snickered. "I didn't think you would. "

"I've already torn myself up over stupid comments. Been there, done that~"

"Been there, STILL doing that."

They busted out laughing.

 

The two men spent most of the day in bed, talking and napping. Texting and surfing the web on their laptops. Of course, they thought of making love. They even talked about it at one point.

And of course it was the awkward Shane Dawson that brought it up. "We could fuck right now and no one would have to know. Unless I have a stalker at my window at all times--which is weird because it is normally me that does the stalking, but anyways--we could do that, and the world would go on spinning."

His racing words were coming back.

"Unless we recorded it," Joey added with that grin of his.

"Oh my god, we could be porn stars!" Shane said enthusiastically, and Joey just burst into laughter. "That's what always happens: you're a loser, then you get famous! But then you're a loser again, and you make a sex tape!"

"Haha! That is very true," Joey agreed. "And very depressing, actually."

Shane was cracking up with him. "That IS very depressing. You kinda get depressing when you retire from youtube."

"Yeah, you should totally go back to making videos~I mean, you're still sad when you're youtubing, but you have some laughs in between." 

"Yeah. But no really, if we did, would you record it?"

He had to think this through. "I mean, it sounds fun at first, but I think it ruins the intimacy. Sex is meant to be private and personal. That's what makes it meaningful, you know. That's so funny that you asked that because I actually thought of recording us making out. But I wouldn't upload it. I would keep it to myself. Is that weird?"

"No," Shane said, smiling. "That's actually very sweet."

"Actually, you know what, no. Nevermind. I would be too paranoid that someone would find it."

"But that's the whole point of Shoey. It's for people to watch and fap to--I mean, cry to."

Joey smirked. "Well, it's Shoey when it's online. But when it's private, just between me and you, it's just Joey and Shane."

Shane nodded, a blush forming in his face. "I like that. I like that a lot."


	6. Daddy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...Every woman adores a fascist,  
> The boot in the face, the brute  
> Brute heart of a brute like you.  
> You stand at the black board, daddy,  
> In the picture I have of you  
> With a cleft in your chin instead of your foot.  
> But no less a devil for that,  
> No not any less the black man who  
> Bit my pretty red heart in two..."
> 
> \--"Daddy", Sylvia Plath.

It was night time when it finally happened. Both Shane and Joey seemed to stir at the same time. They were not too sure of the other's wake until they shifted into more comfortable positions.

"You awake?" Joey whispered into his ear.

"Mmm," Shane hummed. "Yeah. Why?"

"Just curious."

"You okay?" the older man asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Okay. Well, I'm here if you ever need to vent."

It was so dark but Joey's face was so close to his that he could feel him smile. "I know." He kissed him on the cheek.

Shane smiled back. He knew Joey was holding something back. He could feel it. But he didn't want to push. The truth was that Joey WAS holding back, but didn't want to talk.

Then it occurred to him what he wanted. He wasn't sure what to think of it. Before he could even comprehend what was happening, he felt Joey loom over and kiss him tenderly, as if asking for permission. Shane pushed his head upward, deepening the kiss. All of a sudden, faster than how it started, they were hissing through the kisses in pleasure and holding each other tight, as if afraid to let go.

As they kissed passionately, he felt Joey's hand push up against his crotch and felt a yelp in his throat. In an instant, he was hard. When he was with Lisa, it was difficult to become hard and stay hard. They had a great sex life, he just wasn't up for it all the time. He always thought too much. A lot of people didn't know that this was quite common among men. It didn't just happen to women.

Shane reached for Joey's crotch to return the favor but the younger man took his hand and pinned him down. Before he could ask what he was doing, Joey climbed on top of him and started dry humping him. The pinned Shane could only thrust upward.

Lots of thoughts were going through both of their heads. Joey had always known that Shane liked him. Like, LIKE liked him. He was always attracted to him in some way, even when they did collaborations years ago. Now he was making him fall in love and he was afraid of breaking his heart.

Shane's thoughts were a bit more disturbing. 

As they were rutting against each other, he was looking up at the black outline of Joey. For about six seconds, he nearly scared himself to death. He wasn't looking up at Joey. Instead he saw his dad.

His dad was fucking him.

And he had to stop himself from crying out to his dad instead of Joey.

 

Like usual, Shane was the first to stir the morning after, and his first thoughts were: 'Oh god. OH. MY GOD. We did it. It actually happened.'

Then he opened his eyes, saw Joey sleeping next to him, remembered what actually happened and calmed down. They were still clothed. They didn't actually do it.

For a while, he just laid there, watching Joey sleep, wondering how he could have seen this wonderful man as his bastard father. Then he just shook the thought off, knowing he will drive himself crazy thinking about it.

He slowly got out of bed and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast.

 

When Joey came to, his first thoughts were: 'Oh, shit. One more day. Today's the last day. Tomorrow, I have to leave.'

He had to fly back to California and prepare for a long list of events. Vidcon, films to shoot, auditions to criticize, music to record, help with the Amazing Race, etc, etc. 

He opened his eyes and his eyebrows knotted in confusion. "Shane?"

He looks around the empty room, then hears the frying of bacon from the kitchen. 'Ah. He's cooking.'

He slowly sits up on the edge of the bed and looks down at his feet. 'I really don't want to leave him alone.'

Joey summons up some courage and makes his way to the kitchen, wrapping his arms around the cooking Shane from behind.

"Hey," the cook says, warmly. "How are you, Joey Graceffa~?"

Joey chuckles at the way he pronounces his last name. Very classy, very fancy way of saying it. God, it had been so long since he had heard that.

"I'm goody good good," he hums in his ear. "How about YOU, Mr. Yaw~?"

Shane snickers.

"How is ya'll, Mr. Yaw?"

Shane snickers again. "Don't EVER fucking do that again."

Joey burst into laughter. God, he really didn't want to leave him. "So~" he then said, his honey voice trailing off. "I just realized something."

"Oh, yeah?"

"I have to leave by tomorrow morning."

Shane's stirring and flipping grows slow. "Yeah?" he said, the sadness obvious in his voice.

"I would like it if you came with me."

For a moment, both men were quiet. Joey held Shane in his arms as he finished stirring and flipping, then Shane turned around to face his friend, staring into his piercing green eyes. "Are you sure?"

Joey gave him a puzzled look. "Of COURSE, I'm sure."

At first, Shane didn't want to go and tried to think up an excuse not to go with him.

"It'll be fun~!" he pushed. "Vidcon's coming up! Then there's auditions and music to record and such~"

Then Shane realized that there was no denying his situation. If Joey left without him, he would be alone. Alone with his thoughts. Alone with his past. And years of therapy taught him that solitude only worsened his depression. That's why he made videos in the first place: to escape his shitty life, to escape his mind, to escape himself. Make him believe he was someone else. 

Finally, he looked up, smiled and said, "When do we start packing?"


	7. Flight.

The two men stepped up into the place and took their seats, Shane by the window and Joey in the middle. "What's the smile for?" Joey asked, smiling himself. "Whatchu all giggley about~?"

Shane snickered and shook his head shyly. "I don't know. I'm just so...happy. I feel very good."

"That's good~!"

"You know," Shane then said. "I'm really glad I...I'm glad I convinced myself to come along."

Joey's smile went down some. It was still there, only smaller with a hint of seriousness. "Me too. I would've felt bad if I left you behind."

Before Shane could say anymore, the passengers were told to buckle up and the plane was shot into the air.

"Oh, jesus," Shane shuddered when the plane leveled out. "Been a while since I've flown. I definitely do not miss that."

Joey laughed nervously. "Oh, I know. I'm still not used to it."

There was a pause.

Then Shane slowly looked up, and whispered. "Thank you."

"Hm?"

"Thank you. Thank you for visiting me. Thank you for being there for me."

Joey was touched. He smiled that perfect smile of his, and placed his hand over his friend's. "You're welcome."

His hand stayed on top of Shane's, and they shared a tender moment. Then Shane quickly pulled his hand away when a waitress approached them. "Would you boys like a snack or a beverage?"

Shane put his hand up and smiled. "No, thanks."

"No, thank you~"

The woman's eyes widened. Oh, no. "Are you...are you Joey Graceffa? And Shane Dawson? Oh my god. Oh my god!"

The woman sat down and talked their ears off for hours. Weren't her co-workers wondering where she was? Or her fucking BOSS?

Joey, being the friendly guy that he was, didn't mind all too and did most of the talking. At least HE didn't mind. The quiet Shane was annoyed for a bit, but then the woman's bubbly personality reminded him of Trisha Paytas. He smiled remembering his hash tag Trane videos. They were such fun!

She also reminded him of Lisa...

It was at that moment that he realized how much he had changed. He used to be a lot of fun, in despite of his moodiness. Now he was so depressed he thought lowly of fun people that meant no harm.

 

A couple of hours later, the plane finally landed and the two men took a taxi. Thankfully it was very late at night, so they could throw their hoods over their heads and people would not recognize them. Or they would recognize them and not care. They all just got off of tiring flights.

 

It did not surprise Shane that Joey's house was surrounded, nearly GATED, with gardens. The man had always loved nature. It did surprise him knowing that Joey did not have any housemates. He had gone most of his life with one, two or even three roommates. Not just because in the mid 2010's, it was easier to split the bills with two or more people, but because he hated being alone.

Shane could tell he was one of those people. Maybe he finally learned to overcome his insecurities and anxieties. Other than a little independence, Joey had not changed much, and he was glad for that.

They didn't even unpack or brush their teeth. The two men were so tired that they crashed on Joey's soft, soft bed and immediately went to sleep.


	8. Closer.

The days following vidcon were slow and peaceful. Shane would wake up with an arm over him and a kiss to the cheek. They would spend the rest of the days talking about recipes, Joey's plants, then head out into the city later that evening. It wasn't bad. Not bad at all.

The only problem was what happened at night.

"No," Shane would object. "No light."

Joey chuckled innocently, leaning over him and gently stroking Shane's clothed stomach. Just beneath the fragile fabric was his deep shame. "I'm sure you look fine. It's all in your head."

Yeah, well, you never had a body so bad that it took surgery to fix it. 

Shane was not the idealistic type, but Joey was really like an angel to him. He was the most beautiful man he had ever seen. It was a real pleasure to kiss him. Multiple times.

Now the beautiful man wanted more. Or at the very least wanted to try more. It was not that Shane didn't want it either. That wasn't the problem. Joey just wanted "more" with the lights on. It was this shame of his body that made a lot of problems in his sex life with Lisa. Only part of it was the whole "marriage before sex" thing.

"Of course, you're fine with it," Shane said, smirking to attempt to cover it up as a joke. "Your body is perfect."

"Shoot, girl," Joey blushed. "Stop it~"

"It's true." Shane's smirk grew smaller and more bashful.

And so did Joey's. He was serious now. "I have the body of any man. I wasn't born perfect..."

"Yeah."

"...But I understand."

Shane looked up with the eyes of the helpless child that would always be inside. Then Joey turned the lamp, leading to another problem.

It didn't happen the whole time they were in darkness together. They didn't even do much, just take each other's shirts off, feel each other's skin and kiss. Sometimes take their pants off when it got too hot. For about three seconds each time, Shane thought of his dad. It made him want to push Joey away. But thankfully, he hadn't. Not yet.

It just had to be one or the other: in the dark with his dad or in the light with his shame.

 

Shane watched Joey make one of his weird-vegan-superhealth shakes. Whatever. He was going on and on about the berries and other ingredients until Shane slowly ran his finger tips down Joey's hand, sensually, making him stop what he was doing.

Lips ghosted his earlobe. "Hey."

Joey's fingers intertwining with Shane's, he slowly turns around, facing the face holding those lips. Those lips kisses his, tenderly. Then they made their way down Joey's neck, chest until Shane found himself on his knees.

It wasn't until he was kneeling down until he realized that light was all around them. The windows were all open, vulnerable to all the sunlight it would allow...

 

Shane woke up.

Not abruptly, slowly.

The realization must have woken him. "Oh, wow..." He rubbed his sandy eyes and ran his fingers through his bedhead. "Geez."

He was falling for him more and more.


	9. Exposure.

"Well, look who's finally up~," the musical and ever so energetic Joey greeted. "How did you sleep~?"

"Good."

"Good~"

Oh, if only he knew.

Shane made himself some coffee and sat down at the table. They sat in silence for a bit, browsing through their phones. He kept thinking about the dream and pondered if he should pull through with it...

Would he say no?

He shook the thought off. There was so much light around.

"Oh, wow."

Shane was jerked out of his thoughts. "What?"

"Somehow people knew you were with me." He turned his phone in Shane's direction, showing him the gossip page.

He leaned over for a closer look. "Did you tell anyone?"

"Just Lisa."

Shane gave him a look.

"What?"

"This is the internet we're talking about. Trust no one."

"Haha!"

 

Is Shoey Back? 

Shoey Reunited!!!

Old Youtube Ship Shoey Comes Back!

Alledged Sightings Of Shane Dawson And Joey Graceffa!!

Shoey Reunion: Real Or Fake?

Possible Shoey Reunion At Vidcon!

Joey Graceffa Seen With Long Lost Shane Dawson At Airport!

 

Shane immediately thought of the waitress on the plane. "Oh, that BITCH. I knew I didn't like her."

Joey's eyes widened. "LISA?"

"NO! That dumb waitress on the freakin' plane that sat with us for like three hours."

Joey laughed. "Haha! Oh, come on~! It was just an old fan spreading the word!"

A CREEPY fan that talked about she had a picture of him on her wall. Actually, that was the LEAST creepy thing I fan had done. Shoey was also put on phone backgrounds, laptop backgrounds, the subject of crappy slideshows, in painfully misspelled stories by fucking ten-year-olds...

"She should've ignored her mother and continued spreading her legs."

"SHANE YAW! That is so bad!"

 

FAKE.

shane dawson iz a hazben lozer aint no way hez cumin bck

fckin fagz ned 2 just cum out of the fckin clozit alredy

Most likely fake. shane or joey probably spread this lie 2 relive the fame of their old days. both are sociopathic liars. who just openly talks about their childhood abuse, anxiety or their disphoria disorder or whatever the fuck it is? like they always have, they did it for the views.

gAy.. !!!!!!!!

fake

who cares I mean really

REPLY: you read and comented so clearly u care

 

"Ugh," Shane groaned. He couldn't read anymore. He had to keep reminding himself that most of the commenters were just a bunch of stupid kids with no sense.

What was the adjective that Onision liked to use for comments? Oh, yeah--asinine. It was the PERFECT adjective for it all.

He turned to Joey. "Think we should do it?


	10. News.

The two men talked it through, and agreed on not posting a reunion video to clear the rumors. Instead they decided on something a little more fun. 

Shane contacted Destrey Moore.

 

[TITLE: IS *SHOEY* BACK??!? (WTF NEWS).]

(Destrey jumps up wearing a brown wig, plaid shirt and 'EPIC' sunglasses.)

"Hey, what's up, you guys! Welcome to a VERY late episode of 'What the FECK' News!

My name is Destrey, and I haven't done this shit in YEARS.

Like seriously, my last episode was when I was in my twenties.

I'm thirty-one now.

THIRTY-ONE.

Jesus fucking Christ, where did the time go?

For those of you OLD PEOPLE, who actually know who the fuck I am, you are probably wondering why I look like a wig-wearing, cross-dressing homosexual.

Even MORE homosexual than I already look.

But the reason why I look like this is because we are going to talk about our favorite cross-dressing faggot: Shane Dawson.

If you were a whiney little emo teenager in the 2000s that mostly stayed home surfing the web, you probably have seen at least one video from him. At the peak of his youtube career, he posted a video of him kissing another youtube sensation: the extremely attractive Joey Graceffa--

\--Lucky bastard.

The video was a HUGE hit, making it one of Shane's most viewed videos. To this day, the video is STILL being watched and making the underwear of teenage girls explode everywhere.

And out of the video came the ship, "Shoey", which is a combination of their names. Unless you have lived under a rock, you probably have shipped at least one fictional couple. And if you don't know what "shipping" is, don't even bother looking it up.

Seriously.

"Shoey" was a HUGE success, leading the two youtube celebrities to higher fame. Then it slowly went down, and Shane Dawson eventually stopped making videos completely.

But now in 2022, there are rumors of "Shoey" reuniting, and even showing up at this year's vidcon!

And because everyone in the world is freaking out about this, some people are doing this new prank where they are dressing up like the old lesbian-looking Shane Dawson, walking down the streets like that and confusing the crap out of people.

(Shows clips of the prank videos).

He has become the new Elvis.

Anyways, as far as the rumors go, no one knows for sure. All I can say is that if you go to vidcon, you may actually see them. I don't know.

In MORE 'What The Fuck' News..."

 

 

Not long after Destrey's post, Alexis G. Zall followed with her own video.

[TITLE: SHOEY REUNION!! (BombDotCom).]

(*BOOM*.)

(Alexis jumps up.)

"WELCOME to Bomb Dot Com, where we talk about things that are BLOWING up on the internet!"

(*MUSHROOM CLOUD*.)

"And to start this video off, I'd like to say that I may or may not have been shipped with Disney princess Ariel.

...

I'm flattered, but why not Aurora? Just throwing the idea out there.

SHIPPING!

Every generation carries a guilty pleasure that starts in their teenage years all the way down to their graves. For the 1920s generation, it was salad bowl haircuts. For the 80s, it was afros and pet rocks. And for the 2000s, it was shipping.

Wait, I thought shipping started in the 60s. Whatever.

Anyways, the internet is currently blowing up with rumors of the ship "Shoey" reuniting. Youtube sensation Shane Dawson disappeared off of the face of the internet, AND the planet. But now the world SHAKES with accusations.

In the past week, there have been alleged sightings of Shane Dawson EVERYWHERE.

And with those rumors flying around, pranksters thought it would be funny to dress up like the old youtube celebrity and walk down the streets to confuse fans.

(Shows photos of fake Shane Dawson.)

Some pulled it off very well. Others not so much.

Some even paired up with people that stood as fake Joey Graceffas. One pair even made out..."


	11. Vidcon.

#SHOEYREUNION #BRINGSHOEYBACK #REDPLAIDANDBLUESTRIPES

#SHANEDAWSONBACK #SHOEY4EVER #SHOEYISMYOTP

#ANTISHOEY #BRINGSHISABACK #SHANEANDLISA4EVER

#SHISAISBAE #IDONTGIVEASHITABOUTSHOEYORSHISA

 

VIDCON.  
Lauren and Meghan pushed the cart into the storage room and closed the door behind them. 

"Okay, we're in," Lauren said, tapping on the side of the cart.

Shane was the first to emerge, pushing the cloth up over the side. "Awesome," he groaned, stretching his stiff limbs. "Wow, that was a lot of fun. Little baby Jay Jay here is about to fall asleep."

The sleepy Joey slowly emerged after him, rubbing his eyes. "Oh~, that was very soothing. I felt like a baby being rocked."

"If only Lauren's DRIVING was that smooth."

"Hey, I am a fine driver!"

"That's right. You drive like an old person."

"Was this really necessary?" Meghan laughed, interrupting their fight. "No one was around."

Shane stepped out. "Or so you think. Vidcon peoples are VERY sneaky. Seriously."

"They were chased by a huge crowd the other day," Lauren added.

"No way!"

"We were!" Shane then said. "I felt like I was in the running scene from 'A Hard Days Night'!"

Joey burst into laughter. "That is EXACTLY what it was like!"

"Yep, everything was black and white, and I kept falling on my face as I ran."

"Too bad all this sneaking around and other funny fun stuff will be over soon," Joey said, sticking his lower lip out.

"Uh, yeah, if you think it's fun nearly getting trampled for being in a fake online relationship, that is."

 

Joey straightened the last few layers of Shane's bangs. Then he coughed when Joey sprayed his hair afterwards.

"What's THAT for?" he asked, the salty taste now down his throat. He coughed some more. "I think I'm gonna drown in the ocean without actually swimming in the ocean."

"It's to give it texture~"

"Alright! I think that's enough--"

"--Wait, wait. Not yet. A-a-and done. There he is~. The old Shane Dawson."

He turned to look at himself in the mirror and smiled shyly, twirling a bang. "'Old', indeed. I'm too old for this haircut."

"Nonsense~," Joey said, placing a hand on Shane's shoulder. "It's perfect."

Shane reached over for Joey's hand and squeezed it. "You're right. Thank you for this. I'm just a little nervous, I guess."

"How nervous?"

"Not bad. Just butterflies...okay, they got bigger."

"Haha! You'll be fine~," The younger man then leaned down to give Shane a sweet, gentle kiss. A little tug at his bottom lip to tease. Then stood back up.

Shane's butterflies died down for a bit. He followed Joey, standing up to level with him and placed his hands on the sides of his face. He pulls him in for a kiss. Joey tilts his head downward, kissing him back and wrapping his hands around Shane's waist to pull him closer.

Could he do it NOW?

No one was around, and the lighting wasn't too bright...

Shane slowly let one hand fall from his face and squeezed in between them--

"Hey, guys!"

They broke apart, lips and bodies.

"It's almost time!" Lauren called from behind the door.


	12. Old World.

Shane waited behind the curtain, anxiously. The butterflies had grown so big that if felt like he was going to burst.

I can't do this.  
I can't do this.  
I can't do this.  
I can't do this.

I can't. Not now.

Another part of him argued with his anxiety.

Of course, you can. Don't be such a child. You spent most of your life in front of a camera and a stage, millions watching and cheering and laughing at your quick wit.

It's been so long...

For gods sake, man! You're a fucking actor! If you don't want them to see how you really are--ACT!

"Now, I know why a lot of you came here~," he heard Joey say to the crowd. "There are a lot of rumors going around about 'Shoey' reuniting!"

The crowd roared, long and loud.

"We-e-e-ell--"--he saw Joey turn to the back of the stage, at him, and his heart stopped--"--here he is, everyone! SHANE DAWSON!"

ACT!

Shane slid out onto the stage with a large grin, the spotlight blinding him and screaming crowd deafening him.

In order to surprise not only the audience, but also the other youtubers that attended, Shane's participation was kept secret. Only a select few knew he was there, including Joey, Lauren, Meghan, Destrey Moore, and Hank Green.

The dozens of excited faces below and on stage were genuine.

Shane even surprised HIMSELF. While he was waving towards the crowd, he heard a couple shout his name to his left. He turned to look and there was Lisa, George Back, Drew Monson and Trisha Paytas--his old friends!

What on earth pulled him away from all of this? How could he let himself slip away? He left an entire world behind.

"Right here, buddy," he heard Joey say. Out of the spotlight, he saw him sitting down and patting the empty stool next to him.

Shane smiled and sat down. When he did, the crowd cheered again. The Shoey reunion was complete. The screams died down when Joey put the microphone in his face. "There," Shane said, loud and clear. "You can all die happy now."

They all laughed.

Drew stepped forward and grabbed the microphone. "Oh no, you don't. We can't die happy until we see some kissing."

The crowd roared in agreement.

Shane held up a hand. "But Drew...what about you?"

"It's okay, Shane. It's okay. Just...just never forget me, okay?"

"Hold up, hold up," Joey intervened. "WHAT?"

"Oh, it's nothing, babe," Shane said. "It's nothing."

"When?"

"Babe--"

"WHEN?"

Both Drew and Shane looked down.

"It was when we broke up for a couple of weeks. I was lonely and we weren't talking. I thought that you didn't want to see me anymore. I thought you didn't love me anymore."

"Shane...people say horrible things when they're hurt. We were both going through a lot at the time."

"I know. I know, babe--"

"--So did it happen again?"

"No! It was only once! It was nothing--!"

"--It's true, Joey."

"Shut up, you home wrecker!"

"Baby! We only did it because we were both lonely. YOU are the only one for me."

Joey look away. "You're just saying that."

"No, I mean it! No matter what happens, you will always be my first ship."

Most of the crowd was already crying with laughter. Shane was back.


	13. A Product Of Time.

"Just so you guys know, Destrey knew the whole time," Shane revealed to the audience, pointing to the line of youtubers behind him. "For those of you who watched 'What The Fuck' News."

"It's true," Destrey admitted into the microphone. "And I think I was the only one who knew and made a video about it. It was awesome making another 'What The Fuck' News."

"What about Alexis?" Joey asked. "The Alexis of Bomb Dot Com?"

"Alexis didn't know," Shane answered, sticking his tongue out. "She was just talking about rumors like she always does. That little gossip hound." He pointed to the line of youtubers again. "And actually, THESE GUYS, the rest of them, they didn't know either! So they were just as surprised as you guys!"

Joey laughed. "It's true! It was fun sneaking around. I'm gonna miss it. Anyways, YOU GUYS are very lucky. Because I am about to show you the reunion video I made when I visited Shane--"

"Wait," Shane said, lowering his voice. "Are you talking about the shaving...?"

Joey nodded and Shane laughed, covering his face in embarrassment. "Oh my god."

Then Joey laughed at the silly memory. "Yep, this is a video I made without him knowing about it. It hasn't even been uploaded to the internet yet. You guys are going to be the first to see it!"

And so, the lights were dimmed and the video was played along the dark curtains of the stage. A bit rippley, but not bad. Everyone laughed at the sight of the two men wrestling on Shane's living room floor.

While it was rolling, it was then the laughing Shane felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He reached for his phone, and saw that his brother Jared had called him three times. How could he miss that?

He texted: 'Busy right now. Will call u asap.'

And put his phone back in his pocket with a bad feeling.

 

After viewing the latest Shoey video, all of the youtubers left the stage and scattered, free to wander wherever. Shane found himself wandering away from the majority without realizing it. He didn't realize until Joey grabbed one of his shoulders. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Ooh, you scared me! Um, I'm just gonna head back to the hotel real quick."

"You okay?"

"Yeah, why?"

"You've been very quiet. And kind of out of it."

Joey's concern reopened the ACT! from within. "Yeah, my brother called me three times," he said, putting on his best smile and pair of eyes. "I just wanted to call him back without any distractions, you know."

"I hear ya. Go ahead. I'll see you around!"

"See you around," Shane replied, waving.

 

He tried making it back to the hotel room unnoticed. Only one person saw him, and it was someone he never thought he would ever see again.

"Hey."

The voice made Shane jump and look behind him. Holy shit.

It was Greg Jackson. Onision!

"Holy shit!" he said, enthusiastically. "No way!"

They walked up and hugged each other like they never had that infamous twitter war. Time does that to a lot of people, though. "Where are you going?" the banana king asked. "Not gonna join the other youtubers?"

"Oh, I will in a bit," he answered, not knowing whether he should be happy or nervous. Greg was very unpredictable. "Heading back to the hotel. My bro called me three times and I just wanted to talk to him in peace."

"Ah," he said, simply. "Mind if I join you? I'm walking back too."

"Uh, sure." The two men started walking together. "So how's your day going? Hope people aren't giving you too much trouble."

Greg laughed, knowing that he was referring to his hate group that threatened to throw meat and eggs at him. "Nah, it's been fun! That video was funny."

Shane covered his face in embarrassment again. "Oh my god. Joey, why?"

"It's the Shoey reunion! A video had to be made, you know."

"It's true." This was VERY weird. It was like he was talking to a completely different person. "I can't believe people still like Shoey. Even after all this time. I thought it would get old after a while."

"I don't think it will. Especially since it will be in the internet forever. Shoey is like Romeo and Juliet or Scarlett O' Hara and Rhett Butler to some people, you know. They know it's fake, but they will always love it."

That was a very interesting insight. "Wow. I never thought of it like that. I like that..."

Greg walked Shane all the way down to his door.

"Thanks for walking with me," Shane said, unlocking his door. "It was nice talking to you again."

Greg nodded in agreement. "It was."

Then he did something very unexpected. He leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. Then he laughed at Shane's flushed face. "See you around!"

Shane laughed nervously, not knowing what to think of the kiss. "See ya." Then he closed the door behind him.


	14. The Help Of An Old Enemy.

Shane closed his hotel door and fell back onto his bed, arms out.

He thought of a scene from 'Family Guy'. He couldn't remember the name of the episode, but Peter, Joe, Cleveland and Quagmire go out to party and drink. The next day, Quagmire learns that while he was drunk, he married an old hooker. He tries to convince her that he's gay so they can file for a divorce, but she isn't convinced. So she tells him that in order to convince her, he has to have sex with a man right in front of her. Quagmire asks Peter to be that man.

At that point, Quagmire just throws his arms up and says, "What the fuck is going on with my life?"

Yep. That's what he was thinking at the moment. What the fuck is going on with my life.

He kept thinking of Greg's kiss. Whether it was meant to be a joke or not--Shane liked it. He could feel his cheeks and chest heat up. What was going on? Did he have a crush on him...?

At that thought, he reached for his phone, check for wifi and searched an old video of his.

 

[TITLE: GAY KISS with SHANE DAWSON?]

(Camera goes from top of the mirror, then down to the reflection holding the camera.)

"Oooooh--WHO wears lesbian vests~? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo~ SHANE wear lesbian vests~!

 

So today is vidcon..."

 

Wow. This was ten years ago.

Who was this boy?

It looked a lot like him, had his name. It even says he uploaded this video. But really, he did not know who this boy was. He's so musical and happy.

 

(Camera turns to man.)

"Are you excited for vidcon?"

MAN: "Dude, I pooped three times!"

"Yay!"

MAN: "Yay!"

"I like your vest."

MAN: "Thank you. It's one of those new ones, the barely-there vests..."

 

Jared.

JARED!

That's why he went back to the hotel room. What was he doing?

Shane exits out of youtube and scrolls through his contacts. He clicks 'Jared' and waits as it rings.

"Hello?" he heard a voice say.

"Hey, it's Shane."

"Ah, hey Shane!"

"Hey. I saw you called. What's up?"

"Right, well...I'm not sure how to tell you this..."

The bad feeling came back. "What is it...?"

"Mom's in the hospital."

 

Greg woke up from a nap, checked the time and went out to wander vidcon some more. As he was sneaking around, around and through crowds of fans unnoticed, he could not help but see everything as one of his thought videos. He honestly felt naked without a camera in his hands.

Yes, they were often cynical, morbid even, but really--it was all for laughs.

You want philosophical inspiration? Go to conventions. All of humanity in one. 

Okay, now it's getting depressing.

If I ever had a vagina, I'd totally f*ck that guy.

Hm, do I want a Gatorade or a diet coke? I love first world problems.

Diet red mountain dew? You might as well just mix bleach and windex and drink it.

Their thinking process is blocked by exploding ovaries. No, not theirs', Joey Graceffa's.

I wonder what--

Shane?

He leaned in, squinting his eyes to look again. Yep, that was him. But something seemed off. He looked like a lost puppy--scared, confused and scattered. Greg thought of calling his name but did not want to attract fangirls. Shane clearly was in no mood to impress a bunch of melodramatic, idealistic teenagers.

His movements were quick, urgent. Was he looking for Joey?

Greg followed him, getting closer and closer until he knew for sure it was safe to talk to him. "Shane!" he whispered. "Hey, are you okay? You seem tense."

Shane's eyes darted about the place. He could hardly focus. "Uh, yeah. Well, no. Not really."

"What's wrong?"

"Jared told me my mom was in the hospital."

Jared. That must have been his brother, the guy he mentioned earlier. "Oh, wow. I'm sorry. Hope it isn't serious."

"He said she fainted when they went out shopping together."

"Oh, god."

"I need to find Joey. Tell him I need to go."

"I'll help."

"Okay, thanks."

Luckily, Joey wasn't too far. And he wasn't busy talking to fans. As a matter of fact, he was goofing around with Lisa and George.

"Hey," Shane greeted awkwardly, then apologized for the interruption. "Sorry about this."

"Hey~, it's okay," Joey assured. "What's up?"

"Hey, Shane!" Lisa then said, running over to give him a hug. "I never got a hug from you, you big meanie!"

No one even bothered to say hi to Greg.

Shane chuckled and gave Lisa a quick hug. Then he let go and turned to Joey. "Listen, I-I gotta get going."

All of their smiles dropped.

"Right now?" Joey asked.

"Yeah."

"Why, what's wrong?" Lisa then said.

"Jared called. Mom's in the hospital."

"Oh my god," Joey said. "What happened?"

"She was out with Jared and she just fainted. I'm gonna take a train. I'll text you when I get there--"

"--A train? You sure you have enough money?"

All of a sudden, Greg's voice was heard over all of theirs'. "Which hospital?"

"It's in Modesto." He then thought for a moment, trying to remember. "Memorial Medical Center, I think."

"Modesto. That's not far. I can drive you there if you want."


	15. A Troll's Life.

"Who was that?" Lisa whispered to Joey. "You know who that was?"

"I think I've seen him before," he admitted. "I think I've seen him in past vidcons, but I can't remember his name..."

"Same," Lisa agreed. "Oh, wow. I just realized we didn't even say hi to him." She giggled in embarrassment. "I feel kinda bad now."

Joey's jaw dropped. "Oh my gosh, we didn't! Now I feel bad too--"

"--I think that was Onision," George finally said.

Joey and Lisa turned to the youngest youtuber in the group. He knew who Onision was?

"You think?" Joey asked.

"Wait. Isn't Onision the guy Shane got in a huge fight with?"

"It is!" George exclaimed. "Wow, I saw some of his videos. He's funny! I've never seen him before."

"A fight? Shoot! When did this happen?"

"Oh, it was YEARS ago," Lisa explained. "Geez, I don't even remember...Um, I think it was like 2011, 2012 or something like that."

"Yeah, I remember a friend telling me about that," George added. "This was LONG before I started youtubing, so I had no idea what she was talking about!" His contagious laughter spread to Lisa and Joey both. "She said, 'Oh, shit! Onision and Shane are having this huge fight on twitter!' And I was like, 'What the hell are you talking about?'"

Lisa laughed again. "Yep, this was long before you were born! Haha!"

"Wait," Joey interrupted. "So HE'S the guy that freaked out on him on twitter? Called him a fake and a user?"

"Yep."

"No freaking way!"

"Yep. That's funny." Lisa then realized something. "I don't think I saw him on stage with us."

"Now that you mention it, I didn't either," Joey admitted.

"Neither did I. Maybe he showed up late or something."

 

 

"Really, you don't have to do this," Shane insisted.

"Nah, man, it's no problem," Greg insisted just as much. "I was about to leave anyways. I didn't have much to do." He turned a sharp left and Shane followed. "We need to pack all of our stuff before we go."

Shane was so focused on getting to his mom that he almost forgot about packing. "Right. Of course. I need to give Joey the key before we go too. Sorry."

"It's fine."

"Where are you parked?"

"Up front?"

"Okay, I'll meet you up front."

"Cool."

They separated to pack their things. When Shane finished, he went back to look for Joey but came across Lisa first. "Lisa!"

"Oh, hey, Shane! What's up?"

She excused herself from a group of friends to meet up with him.

"I almost forgot," he said, handing her his key. "Could you give this to Joey?"

"Oh, of course!" she answered, and hugged him one last time. "I'm sure everything is fine."

He held her tightly, then let her go. "Thank you. You are the real reason I'm here. You're the one who sent Joey."

She gave him a warm smile. "Anything for a friend."

He smiled back. "Alright. I'll message you when I get there. Bye!"

And so Shane fast walked to the front of the building, where he met up with Greg and walked to his prius.

"Still the environmentalist, I see," Shane said, stepping into the passenger's side.

"Well, duh. Not only that, the gas on this thing is freakin' awesome."

"Not much protection, though."

"Jeeps have even LESS protection and I don't see anyone bitching about them."

Shane laughed. "It's very true!"

He started the car and they pulled out into the highway, heading north. "So you just flew back here with Joey?"

"Yep."

"Coolio. Where do you live now?"

"Oregon."

"Oh, wow. Why did you move away from Cali?"

Shane didn't even know anymore. Why DID he move away from the city that brought him to fame and success? "I don't know. I was just...overwhelmed, I guess."

"I hear ya."

Then Shane thought of something. "Were you on the stage when I stepped out?"

He honestly did not remember him being there.

"No."

"No?"

"Nope," Greg said again, laughing.

"We're you late?"

"Nope."

"Then what was up?"

Greg laughed again. "Hank Green thought it would be best if I laid low."

"Ah. Still bad with the haters?"

He snickered. "Always."

"So you were just creeping around the whole time?"

"Yep."

"Sounds rough."

"It's a troll's life."


	16. Dread.

The two men shared a small laugh, then only the radio and the hum of the wheels could be heard. Hardly a word was spoken, but they did sing and dance to funny songs. Shane honestly did not feel like a youtuber again until that moment.

What walked across the stage and sat on the stool was an act.

After several minutes of silence with occasional silliness, Shane finally said, "I gotta be honest with you--I'm kinda weirded out here."

Greg burst into laughter again. "Haha! I was waiting for you to say that! Weirded out by us hanging out?"

"Yes," Shane snickered. "Of COURSE you were. You troll."

"Why are you weirded out by this?"

"Oh, nothing. Just that years ago we kinda hated each other. Didn't expect it to turn out like this, I guess."

"Yeah. But that was years ago. Let the past remain in the past."

Shane nodded in agreement. He didn't want to accidentally turn this into another fight. "Right."

There was another long pause. Nothing but radio and wheels ago.

Both of them jumped when Shane's cell phone rang. "Jared," he mumbled. "Hello? Hey...what?" He leaned over, his hand over his mouth. "How long?"

Greg felt his stomach drop. No. It couldn't be what he thought it was.

"Okay...yeah, I'll see you later. Love you too. Bye."

He ended the call and his hand moved from his mouth to over his eyes.

"Is everything alright?" Greg asked. It was a dumb question. It obviously wasn't, but what else could he say?

"Not really."

"What's wrong?"

Shane sighed. "They just figured out she has leukemia."

Somehow, Shane's racing thoughts made the world slow down.

He thought of his mother's warm embrace as she protected him and his brothers from their alcoholic father.

He thought of his mother constantly assuring him that the future would get better.

The few nights she had to pet him to help her scared baby fall asleep.

Her helping him find his first job.

Her still loving him when his stupidity left the without any money and almost without a home.

Her taking his hands and praying to God for a successful surgery.

Her praying to God and thanking him for a successful surgery.

Her bringing fun, joy and laughter to some of his videos.

Was this really happening? Was he going to lose his mother forever?

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO  
OH, DEAR GOD NO NO NO NO  
PLEASE NO PLEASE NO PLEASE NO

 

After the phone call, they had to drive another hour. It felt like the longest hour of his life.

"Here we are," Greg finally said, taking a left into a large parking lot. "Memorial Medical Center."

Shane remained silent until the prius was parked. "Thank you." All of his sorrow and gratefulness was choked out in one. "Thank you so much."

Greg put a hand on his shoulder. "Anytime."

Then Greg's mind blurred as Shane leaned over to the driver's side, giving him the lightest of kisses on the cheek.

He couldn't think straight. All he thought of was placing his fingers under Shane's chin, and gently moving his lips to his own. Shane then leaned in some more, returning the kiss.


End file.
